156. I gave them sex, both cyber and real...
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Dear Dr. Smith

I am confused, hurt and distraught. My life is a mess and I don’t know where to start. I have just ended a relationship, the fifth one and it has left me empty, dry, disgusted and hurting. I don’t know what is the problem, but in every relationship that I find myself in, it ends in a mess. I feel sad, lonely, dejected and I just want to cry. I have given up everything to make my relationships last, and what did I get in return? Nothing, just rejection! I gave them sex, both cyber and real, my love, my loyalty, but they all took me for the ride and left me dry. I hate men and I hate myself and I hate everything. I don’t even know where I stand with the Lord. Please help my desperate aching heart.

Dear Confused, Hurt & Distraught,

Thanks for reaching out to me. I can see that you are looking for love in all the wrong places and with all the wrong methods. Your first problem is that you are not faithful to yourself.  You are empty and desperate and you are seeking for a relationship that will fill you void. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen that way, so you will forever be searching and getting the disappointment.

There is a phrase that says, "to thyself be true", that you have not been able to master. You have admitted that all the men in your relationships have taken you for a ride. Won’t you stop being a horse then, and be a lady. No man can ride a lady but every man can ride a horse. If you count the amount of times you have had sex whether real or cyber, and the number of different men, then you will agree with me that, that it is FAR too many for a "child of God".

Until you get in touch with your true self, get some professional help, and build a genuine relationship with God, you will be forever miserable.  You will continue to use sex and relationships as your medication. Unfortunately, though, Satan has prescribed the wrong medication. Why not get a second opinion, try going to Dr. God this time.

I still believe you have enough strength within you and with God's help to turn your life around. Cut the sex, cut this insatiable desire to have a relationship and turn to an infinite God for help.

Take a hold of yourself. Stop the self-pitying, get out of your denial, get out of your dysfunctional pathological stupor, develop impulse control, let go of that un-differentiated emotional crave and turn yourself back into that beautiful symphony of a lady, the one God intended you to be.

Keep strong, keep hoping, fix up yourself, embrace your possibilities, you are a child of promise, you are from the Prince of Peace, you have a right to be here. So, stand with poise and confidence upon the wings of the storm. Fight off every temptation to do wrong. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Fly into the canopy of God’s compelling compassion. Remember, God is still not finish with you yet, therefore, don’t give up on yourself so quickly.

Be assured that I will be praying for you.

God bless.

Dr. Smith.
For more information about Dr. Smith's services go to www.familyfixers.org