160. They could drop dead for all I care
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Dear Dr. Smith
The Bible says confess your sins one to another. Well, I did something terrible, but I am not about to confess to them or to anyone. They could drop dead for all I care. I have already asked God to forgive me, and that should suffice. My question however, is, why do I feel guilty when I take communion. If someone hurts you and you hurt them back, why should I feel guilty. Just asking.

Dear “Just Asking”
Why do you quote the bible when you don’t plan to follow it? If you have no plans for making amends for the “terrible” thing you did, then why are you worrying? Just live your life the way you choose and wait for the next person to cross you, then hurt them also. Wow! Are you proud of such self-imposed conflict resolution? By the way, did you say that you asked God to forgive you? Was that after you wish the person to drop dead or before? You see, the last time I checked, the model pray our Savior left us says, “and for give us as we for give others” (Matt 6:12). So what did you say to God about the one that you wished to drop dead? A good memory of the “Haman” story is quite apropos here.

Your feeling of guilt after the communion service is coming from a live conscience. You are in denial of your true self. Deep down you know that you acted with spite and malice, but your stubbornness, hurt and anger will not allow you to ask for forgiveness or to give it. Instead you are allowing the spirit of revenge to be a panacea to your aching heart. My friend, life is not about “tit for tat”, it’s about forgiveness, let go, move on and take things to the Lord in prayer.

I pray you will find it in your heart both to confess and to forgive. No matter what a person has done to you, you have to forgive them. You may not accept them back, but you should forgive them, if for no other reason, for the peace of your own soul. Also, you need to make full confession to the one you have wronged. You should promptly put the Matt 18 and the Matt 5:23-24 principles into practice. May God give you the strength and the courage to go and do the right thing.

I remain,

Dr. Smith
For more information about Dr. Smith's services go to www.familyfixers.org