180. His snoring irritates me...
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Dear Dr. Smith,

We’ve been married for 6 years and we love and respect each other, now I ‘m pregnant with our 2nd child. My husband developed a habit of snoring in his sleep and it irritates me. We fight a lot over this noise that he makes and it disturbs my sleep.
I am not sure if the matter is with my pregnant moods or not. I love him so much though, what should I do?

Concerned wife.
Dear Concerned wife,
I assessed your problem to be “much to do about nothing”.  First of all, your husband did not “develop” a habit of snoring in his sleep. We develop a habit in eating too much, drinking alcohol, using drugs, spending too much, being abusive, etc. Bad habits are character flaws that people develop. Snoring is not a habit, let alone a bad habit. One does not choose to snore or not to snore. It’s a symptom that could occur as a result of an underlying medical problem.

I believe you genuinely have been arguing with your husband because you thought it was his fault why he snores. But you are so wrong. So, for heaven’s sake, stop thinking that way. As a matter of fact, it is quite possible that you snore a little also or breathe heavily. I used to tell people that I don’t snore until my wife said, “oh yes you do!” end of story.

But whether you snore or not, or will snore in the future, is not the issue; the real issue is that snoring is not a disorder or something we purposely do. I would suggest that he sees his physician for professional help.

You seem to have a good thing going in your marriage; don't destroy it over irrational thinking. Quiet yourself down and find a way to sleep amidst his snoring. Also, do not make the mistake of moving out of the bedroom or asking him to move. If you do, your real troubles will soon start.

Go back and tell your husband that you are sorry for all those unnecessary arguments you created over his snoring and that you are willing to work with him to get medical help.

By the way, I don’t think its because of your pregnancy why your are irritated over the snoring. Thanks for your question and may God keep blessing you and your marriage.

Dr. Smith
For more information about Dr. Smith's services go to www.familyfixers.org