196. I had a moment of weakness
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Dr. Smith

I had a moment of weakness two months ago and slept with a girl. The next morning both of us felt bad under conviction. We repented. I have been walking with the Lord since then and so has she. I have started ministry school too! And I am part of a xxx and xxxxx program. Well I just found out she's pregnant and I know we repented and asked for forgiveness but do I need to tell my pastor and accountability partner and do I need to step down? I sure hope not.

My Dear Friend,
I am very sorry to hear of your unfortunate lapse in judgment. You have dug yourself into a deep hole. Your repentance to God is a wonderful thing and be assured that God had forgiven you both if you truly repented. However, there are certain consequences that we must face because of our action and this is a terrible one for you.

There is no question that you will have to tell your pastor and the person you are accountable to and I am sure they are going to relate it to Conference President. My strong feeling is that they will require you to change your occupation from ministry. Dear friend, the damage is already done, if she tries to get an abortion it will only make matters worse. If you hide it and continue ministry, it will come back to haunt you some day, besides, you should not do ministry under a cloud of deception.

If you try to use the deception to your advantage, thinking that no one will know, unfortunately, that deception will follow you in your ministry and will come to light when you least expect it. Remember the story of Jacob. Your best bet is to walk away now and don't waist financial resources perusing a career that one day the leaders will ask you step down from. That would be most embarrassing for you and your family. In my professional judgment, your best bet is not to start.

It is possible that someone might say to me that David was a murderer and an adulterer and God forgave him and called him a man after His own heart. My response to them would be, “so true”, however, David was punished for his sins. The one thing he desired most, was to build the temple at Jerusalem (2 Sam 7), and that God did not grant him. Instead he chose his son Solomon to build the temple. Besides, the son that was born as a result of his adultery, God took his life. (2 Sam 12:13)

I am truly sorry to hear of your unfortunate situation, but ministry is not a thing to pretend away. You knew you wanted to enter the ministry, you therefore should have exercised more impulse control. There can be no masking of your behavior, you will have to accept responsibility and consequences and move on.

Please tell your pastor your reason for not wanting to continue in the ministry again. The best you can do for yourself is to be honest with yourself. There are many other occupations that you can do successfully, remember, God has not forgotten you and He still has a place for you. When one door is closed, God’s grace of restoration can help you to open many other doors.
God bless and I will be praying for you.

Dr. Smith
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